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timshel.

Composition

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"Everything counts a little more than we think..."

27 November 2006 Monday

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slated in mused, mood at 8:55 pm

6:37am~ My brother was home for Thanksgiving. He’d been away at school for the past many months.

His being away meant that whenever I had orange juice in the fridge, I could count on it still being there the next day; it wouldn’t be disappeareded and finished (within 1-2 days), until I drank it and finished it. That was pretty cool.

My brother and I don’t interact a whole lot.. I’d say that it’s because we simply have different interests, but that’s not really it… we just.. don’t.

But even so.. It took several weeks for me to not feel like the house was empty/missing him without him there. And the feeling never completely went away; he should be downstairs, I should run into him randomly in the house throughout the day; I should call him up for breakfast, buy back some snacks for him.. But he’s been off at school and seemingly occupied and happy over there, so good. I’ve been fine here without him, though he’s been thought of and his absence is still noticed.

So he was home for Thanksgiving. And we actually didn’t interact all that much while he was here. But.. the instant he was on a plane back to school, he was missing again, and I missed him. He wasn’t in the car, next to me. He wasn’t walking in the door with me and being greeted when we visited family friends. He wasn’t around for me to wonder what time he’d be home and safely in his room and bed downstairs.

It’s not severe; my days haven’t changed and I’m really okay with him being away. However, it emphasizes with clear illustration the way memory and relationships work; distance, space, time.
It applies.

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