“I committed social suicide in kindergarten.”
That’s what colors are for: so we can see the differences, and care about them.
“He will if he wants to. And if he doesn’t then he doesn’t and then what does it even matter.”
“You might be too mixed.”
“I don’t care about her. She’s a slut.”
“This is wrong from more angles than a fractal polygon”
I discovered at a very early age that if I talk long enough then I can make anything right or wrong. So, either I’m God, or truth is relative. And in either case: Booyah.
“and and… I got to use the word emasculate before 10am”
...>>“Maybe you need more pockets in your dresses.”
I wtf your wtf
replacing pants with even better ones before meeting the bros is magical enough for me.
I don’t give a flip about tradition but I’ll be damned if I sour my palate to please the kimchi.
— I guaran-god-damn-dee you.
“I love you so much my heart just invaded my left lung to make room.”
You are a lifetime’s ambition.
my love for seth and andy is real. it relocates mountains and pays parking tickets.
Babies are touch-sensitive — like an ipod.
I’m taking that too.
steinbeck named his truck
made me think of you
fortunately he has plenty of other qualities to make up for it
“You know what? I wished for you too.”
