18 November 2009 Wednesday

https://ferrydust.com/journal/2216/2009-11-17-tuesday

I am not feeling entirely myself this week. But still more me than anyone else may ever be.

Conceptually, I understand there’s an order to things. I understand the dynamics and implications of cause and effect and things as such. But I have a hard time with the phrase and mentality, “it is what it is is” as an explanation or excuse.

Rage and apathy.. One is generally unsustainable, the other is generally… well, it’s not really anything, is it?
What if it’s not true apathy, but inaction? indecision? Perhaps greater passion for other things. Perhaps simply movement without deliberation or intention. But movement is movement and movement is something, isn’t it? Isn’t it? It is…what it is. Okay. Then what it is it? Maybe let’s not know; maybe let’s not have to figure anything out; maybe we just keep moving until something clicks into place on its own. I understand the dynamics of cause and effect. I understand there are implications in action and inaction. But life’s too short and darling to dwell on consequences. But life’s too short and darling to live with some consequences. Which consequences shall we live with?

::paragraph on names.. ramble on books… scattered thoughts of soft things and technology and colors::

I used to be able to do pull-ups/chin-ups. Once upon a time. Of course, I weighed much less then.
So I have more weight than I used to. But I still open my palms.