28 August 2008 Thursday

https://ferrydust.com/journal/2029/how-much-is-too-much

How much is too much? I’ve been playing with that question for years now, and I’ve decided that the question doesn’t matter. The cost for something can be too much and still be worth paying, or still be paid regardless of its worth. So much is hard-coded into our biology(anatomy+++), and so many quotes cite that our biology is one opponent we cannot defeat. But we’re human so we try anyway. I think we can accept our biologies without surrendering. I think we can recognize ourselves and take responsibility; be true to our natures and to our intentions and potentials. We can love, and be loyal and gracious and courageous. And we can be simple, reaching out and making basic steadfast choices to choose and to trust and to share and accept.
“Too much?” and “not enough?” are the same questions.

Continuing a conversation from this morning, and remembering a radio report [re:] last night that remarked upon our selves as defined by the flow of time past present future and our influence, control and place in each;
I propose that we are defined by our perception of tomorrow(and what we did yesterday and that we have control over what we do today). What we do is based on expectation of tomorrow; having a tomorrow.. We make decisions about what to do with ourselves and our time based on how much future opportunity we have.. And we invest in things that we expect to last. You do not invest in something that will not last—though you may opt to take as much from it as you can before it’s gone. But that’s further investment in yourself/wherever you’re putting/keeping what you’re taking.
Jumping back to the morning conversation — how can you invest properly in a relationship that is open for ending? How can and why should you be yourself and be honest and true when there may not be a tomorrow? Important things should be kept safe. Why is closing them out or losing them an option? “You can’t keep safe what wants to break.” [cite]
And by now I have a few dozen conversations and situations and people and memories in mind and I’m mixing issues and concepts.. They all relate, though.

P.S. New motherboard for Dani.. Might have been simply to address sound issue.. but it all fits together, neh? Safe over sorry.