i head back over to ohio this weekend… the last time i was there was last fall… so… that makes it over a year since i was there? hm. i’m looking forward to it a bit more than i thought, actually.. which is a bit unusual… i try to avoid the whole “looking forward” to things… particularly this last couple of years. i know certain people will protest to my saying so, but the whole “no expectations” thing generally is a good thing.. even if it doesn’t wholly work. pizza’s cooking. i’m starving. bring back the sun and the clear skies. 2003’s never been here before…
sleepy,
comfortable,
a bit cold,
powerful,
a bit annoyed,
bored,
quite alright.
there’s snow on the ground. who knows how much will still be there when i wake up (not that it’s quite knee-deep right now as it is) but i’ll go to sleep knowing
that there is snow outside my window, blanketing my driveway;
that my daddy will be napping at home tomorrow,
that my mommy will be in a playing mood (tho she’ll tell me to shovel the driveway),
that my grandmother will tell me my wish for snow was granted,
and that my brother will be waking me up to play in the morning, saying “chal!! challo! wake-up-o! challo!”
how happy is that?
dream: asian store, different treats in same basket, class.. sitting.. one person sitting in front, one sitting behind… mumbling.. talking… sitting elsewhere.. a round laminated piece of art/work that is familiar.. signed by else.. by me on back; i keep.. familiar/representative identities.. japanese the asian store? keep wanting to say ‘thankyou’ but undecided on language…
cambodian temple this morning… then out till late afternoon having mommy-daughter time.. sun leaves so fast…
slated in
stuff at 5:42 am
we know how i like to take these ‘identity’-type test things more than once to confirm… well.. apparently, my compatibility with my own self goes like this:
and furthermore… apparently:
| I have issues with… |
violence
history x2
past
genetics
paranormal
memory
gender
ambivalence
forever
pain x2
broken
accident
murder
chaos
immortality
theft
identity
dishonesty
poor
religion x2
weather |
Take Word Association Test
dream: classroom… baby… group counselling/legal session.
beaUtiful day.
lots of dreams. something moving into chestertown again… furniture not being sufficient for my usual room setup.. roommate is handicapped (wheelchair).. end up considering changing sides of the room (i usually always keep to the same spot i’ve had plotted and lived in so long/previously).... segment about going to the diner and taking the freshmen to the upperclassmen diner (something about my friends not knowing i’m back yet… so i’ll run into them whenever)... something about being found by an agent of good or something and being turned over to specific side… then her daughter is attacked by an agent of bad because she wasn’t supposed to interfere with peoples’ paths and directions… turns out i have some power (like energy rays/telekinetics) and potential for real influential power.. ...those are the gists of it..
my throat hurts lots. too much chocolate-eating lately, i guess. my god my bed feels so good… i only left it cuz i’m feeling a bit guilty about sleeping into the 1 and 2 o’clock zones of the day. eels - fresh feeling still being heavily played on my list.
ending the night with this.. ‘Collective Soul’ – Needs“all around me, i see what weakness has made. too much tomorrow.. i think i’ll take all today. am i a poison? am i a thorn in the side? am i a picture-perfect subject tonight? here i slumber to awaken my daze.. i find convenience in this savior i save.. am i a prison? am i a source of bad news? am i picture-perfect reason for you? in this time of substitute, it’s my needs i’ve answered to all the while.. and all the hope that i invest… turns to signals of distress, all the while. i don’t need nobody.. i don’t need the weight of words to find a way to crash on through.. i don’t need nobody.. i just need to learn the depth or doubt of faith to fall into.”
![iching: Fêng - Abundance [Fullness]](https://ferrydust.com/images/21.gif){kind=small}